I was very happy the day we adopted our three children. I knew that some of the challenges ahead for us was going to be difficult, but knew God wanted us to give these children a home. Looking back I remember thinking that now they were our children so soon they would adjust to us and come to the realization that we loved them and wanted what was best. Shoot we had 3 other children and knew how to raise children. These children from hard places were going to be a little harder, but how bad could it get. Now what I am about to share with you I want you to understand that I am dedicated to raising ALL my children. I am dedicated to loving them and would not change adopting them. As I said above, God made it clear for us to adopt these children and they are precious especially in His site.
I am writing this because I am so sick and tired of that “plastic smile”. You know…it is that smile that people expect you to wear because you are supposed to be super mom. I hate to break it to you but there is no such thing as a super mom and it is a lie from Satan that it is capable to achieve! Daily is a struggle for me… big time! Homeschooling on top of running a house with 8 people residing in the same living quarters is “interesting” to balance.
Adoption has totally changed our life. My birth children have suffered, my freedom has been lost, many of my dreams have been extinguished, most days are very stressful and I am usually totally exhausted. Yet people seem to think me as an amazing woman (I AM NOT). Adoption and just plain being a mom is tough! I am sharing this because too many people paint parenting and adoption like a fairy tale experience.
Yep my plastic smile is not on and I never want to put it on again. I want to be open and honest before my Lord so He can do His mighty work on me. I want to be called a woman after God’s own heart. I would love that on my headstone. God is defiantly working on me to mold me. I try hard with the kids to raise them right, yet I do fail. Some days I have great victories, other days not so much. My new motto is “Life is hard; so toughen up and buckle up!”
Each day I must learn how to handle different situations with each one of the adopted children. Like one being so prideful that this child tells us how this child is more important than all the other family members, does not want to be in our home, but wants to be with birth mom, waits until my back is turned and blatantly disobeys my rules, has to be watched around the opposite sex, and lies like nothing to it. Another one is a big bully. Many things offends this child which in turn this child will get physical with whom offended. This child also hurts our dogs and other siblings. Then the other child is special needs and takes up most of our time emotionally and physically. Running to special needs school, speech, physical, and occupational therapies is a daily occurrence.
Yes God is working on me big time. Really think it all through and search God’s will before adopting and before having children. Are you willing to get tough and yet be broken in the process?
Psalms 119:143-146
