A FEW THOUGHTS

A few things have been on my mind lately and I just wanted to share.

First I wonder if we as a society (worldly and Christian) realize how we have put such an importance on motherly instincts to the point that we have distanced precious women that have not giving physical birth.  Shame on us! Let me right now apologize for those times I have done this. I want to put a stop to this myth that only if you have giving birth do you have these instincts! They (instincts) are truly a gift from God not just because I have carried a child for 9 months or so! I can testify to it! We all are going to scratch our head to why a baby is crying or why our older child is lying, but there are those times that I do KNOW why! When it happens I believe it is not this magical instinct, but a true gift from God. It happens with my birth children and my adopted children. In fact I have experienced it even more profound with my adopted children which on some days just blow me away! So if a mom (birth or adopted) ask you not to hold or feed her baby, to allow her to only comfort her little one, or not to let her child lead the line in Sunday School realize that God has given her the responsibility to raise that child and “instinct” to know how to do it right! Don’t lean over and say after I just corrected my son for a sin and tell him it is ok we all make mistakes! I am the mom not you! You may scratch your head as to why, but it really isn’t your right to even ask why. Just give God the glory that our God has gifted this mom and not YOU for this particular child!!!

Second how would you define yourself? As a mom (I just defined myself) I wonder how my kids would answer. I know they would answer differently during the changes in their life, but my point is there are many things I do not want them to define themselves and one that I want them to always to do. I am a follower of the Most High God! Yes I am a mom, wife, sister, and daughter, but I want to be known as a person who is like my Savior. I also desire with all my heart that my children do too!

 I think about how the world wants to define my kids. I get looks for many labels/defining that people put on us like homeschool and big family. Homeschooling can have a VERY negative response in some circles and positive in some others. With my three oldest I have almost always heard great things about them. One day I heard a very negative thing about my oldest. Mother bear wanted to come out because it was not said in love to me, but God did a work in my and her heart that day. We set out to make sure that if this accusation/defining had some truth in it. I wanted come alongside her and help her grow in that area. It ended up being untruth.  

You know it got me thinking about the world’s perspective on adopted children. There biggest reaction is underlining in how the person talks and treats my adopted child. If they have been around and know that we adopted them from foster care they assume they were abused. They treat them like a VICTIM (Oh, you poor child syndrome)! NO! they are not! Let me use the example of our Father in Heaven who rescued us by adoption…we are no longer in bondage with Satan! Romans 6:11, “So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.” Romans 6:14, “For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law, but under grace.” Neither are these kids in bondage to being victims. As Christians we want to (Lord please forgive us!) go back to our old master and so do these kids want to relish in the old feelings of what they think is control and also self-pity. My job as mom is to teach them how to change old behaviors, heal from the past, to count blessing, and look to see where God is working in their life. Some of those ways seem weird to others. My children will not be victims, but victors over the past. We look forward and count our blessings. I do not want my children to be defined as a lost sinner or as a victim. I want them to be a Child of the King and victorious in this life.

Third I have gotten a lot of questions and comments about my weight loss. Many of the questions are how I lost about 57 pounds. Just so you know if you find them I do not want them back! It is easy for me to answer Weight Watchers, but that is only the tool God has used for His glory. Today I went to go to my weigh in. I only have a few more pounds to get to the top of the range for my weight goal. I was praying and again giving back to God what He has done when it hit me all the things I have gone through in this past year with the weight loss. I started to just cry out to Him and give Him the glory. This process started when I realized I struggled with self-control in my eating. I want to be woman that can control myself and be that example for my kids! God has done some amazing work by teaching my how to control and change habits and have endurance. This endurance comes from reliance on Him when the desire for weight loss at times does not come. The physical changes are wonderful: much smaller clothes, more energy, some medical issues gone, and just feeling better. However, I treasure the closer relationship with my Heavenly Father much more. Yes the physical changes are great, but they are just a bonus to the spiritual changes that have been going on.  Thank you, my God, for an amazing husband to love me no matter what I look like and most importantly for your unfailing love and strength through all this past year’s journey.